when in southern arkansas,

you must listen to country music. or at least classic rock. it just doesn't seem right driving without one or the other on the radio.

you must also eat a lot of barbecue and fried catfish. it's heaven in your mouth.

you must speak a little more "southern" than normal. especially when you get around your closest friends or family.

you must lose cell phone service at least once. or at least be on roam.

you must see rice fields, and cotton fields, and wheat fields and somehow find God in the beauty of it.

you must pass a car on a two-lane highway. if it's not a car, then it's a tractor driving 15 mph. after you pass that car or tractor, you must be able to drive 75 mph, and know you won't get a speeding ticket. that road will probably be named after the family that's lived on it for 100 years. (and no, i don't drive that fast. anymore.)

you must have a large garden in the summertime. or at least know someone who does, and mooch fresh veggies off them. most of the time, they've got more than they can handle anyway and grow a garden just to give it all away.

you must see american flags everywhere.

you must square away a couple of hours to do your grocery shopping, because you'll see a million people in wal-mart that you know and find a need to catch up in the middle of the aisle.

and you must...you absolutely must own a pair of rubber boots. how else would you play outside after it rained all night?